Don’t believe reports that yesterday’s special Cabinet meeting was held to discuss spending cuts and taxes to gain control of public finances.
I can exclusively reveal that the emergency meeting was demanded by a very distraught Martin Cullen after he watched a report on Six One News (12th item) last Friday.
His Excellency was devastated to learn that Cisco had developed a revolutionary Teleconferencing system that could practically do away with the need to physically travel to ‘very important’ meetings.
In addition to saving millions in expenses the new system is environmentally friendly with Cisco slashing its travel budget by 50% last year thus saving over a hundred thousand metric tons in carbon emissions.
It is reported that His Excellency nearly choked on his caviar on hearing the news and immediately called on Biffo to convene an emergency meeting.
Leaks from the meeting indicate that while most ministers are happy to use the new technology His Excellency is totally opposed.
I’m all for technology, he said, but we also have to think of image. This new fangled machine will not impress the peasants, not if they’re deprived of the sight of their leaders travelling to very important meetings in expensive cars, helicopters and planes.
We’ve got to lead by example, he said, give them something to aspire to.