His Excellency Martin Cullen devastated by news of new technology

Don’t believe reports that yesterday’s special Cabinet meeting was held to discuss spending cuts and taxes to gain control of public finances.

I can exclusively reveal that the emergency meeting was demanded by a very distraught Martin Cullen after he watched a report on Six One News (12th item) last Friday.

His Excellency was devastated to learn that Cisco had developed a revolutionary Teleconferencing system that could practically do away with the need to physically travel to ‘very important’ meetings.

In addition to saving millions in expenses the new system is environmentally friendly with Cisco slashing its travel budget by 50% last year thus saving over a hundred thousand metric tons in carbon emissions.

It is reported that His Excellency nearly choked on his caviar on hearing the news and immediately called on Biffo to convene an emergency meeting.

Leaks from the meeting indicate that while most ministers are happy to use the new technology His Excellency is totally opposed.

I’m all for technology, he said, but we also have to think of image. This new fangled machine will not impress the peasants, not if they’re deprived of the sight of their leaders travelling to very important meetings in expensive cars, helicopters and planes.

We’ve got to lead by example, he said, give them something to aspire to.

2 thoughts on “His Excellency Martin Cullen devastated by news of new technology”

  1. What Minister Cullen needs to understand is that even Oprah has suffered in the current climate and has been reduced to using Skype on air for her daily Circus.

  2. This guy will never learn, he’s one of the group who have had their feet in the trough for so long that they find it near impossible to back off…shame won’t do it; hints from ‘above’ and ‘below’ won’t do it; media exposure won’t, either. The only way to curb the excesses of him and people like him is at the next General Election. After which it might be interesting to see how much gallivanting this lad does when he has to buy the tickets…

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