State sponsored legal rackets

A United Nations committee on torture has described as stunning the high number of Nigerians whose applications for refugee status are refused by Ireland (Nine News).

The Secretary General of the Dept. of Justice, Sean Aylward, defended the record by saying that there was a legal racket going on in stringing things out.

Could it be that those Nigerians, who Mr. Aylward so casually accuses, are taking their cue from the multitude of legal rackets engaged in by Irish politicians and civil servants?

Never ending tribunals, useless Dail Committee inquiries and numerous police investigations that never seem to end in convictions.

Ruthless and corrupt politicians, bankers and other white collar criminals all rest easy in their beds in the secure knowledge that they and their ill gotten gains are well protected by a myriad of state sponsored legal rackets.

Once again we're disgraced by a political leader

I spoke with a friend shortly after the speeches by Enda Kenny and Barack Obama in Dublin.

He thought Obama’s speech was better and that Kenny went on too long.

I disagreed; I thought Obama’s speech was a standard, harmless election speech aimed solely at the Irish constituency in the US.

Kenny’s speech, I thought, was passionate and very well delivered. I was aware that he might go on too long but Obama, in the background, seemed to be enjoying the Taoiseach’s contribution.

Now I know why Obama was laughing in the background. It wasn’t from admiration for Kenny’s oratory skills but, probably, from contempt that neither he nor any of his officials were capable of writing an original speech.

What we, and the whole world, witnessed was just another typical Tammany Hall stroke by a gombeen Irish politician.

When the scam was uncovered the reaction was predictable – lies.

The use (theft) of Obama’s words was, we were told, to honour the man. This, of course, is bullshit.

If this was true Obama would have been informed and would have received public and proper credit for his own words.

Once again the Irish people have been disgraced by a political leader.

Pension levy: Strictly for the peasants

Taken from a ‘letter to the editor’ in today’s Sunday Independent on the matter of the recently imposed levy on private pensions.

A few short weeks back he said in the Dail that he was unable to do anything about a very large pension pot awarded to former AIB boss Colm Doherty because of contractual arrangements and pension legislation.

Yet on Tuesday last, as quoted on the Department of Finance website, he appeared to have no difficulty in changing the self-same contractual arrangements and pension legislation to rob the ordinary person. Could you ask Mr Noonan to explain the difference between Colm Doherty and me?

Garret Fitzgerald: A giant among midgets

Garret Fitzgerald was a genuinely decent man who was much loved.

He was also a courageous and visionary political leader who worked hard to bring Ireland into the 20th century.

He was particularly courageous in taking on the power of the Catholic Church by way of his constitutional crusade.

In a real democracy he would be seen as an exceptional politician.

Measured by the very low standards in Irish political life he was a giant among midgets.

Albert Reynolds: Still hale and hearty except for answering Tribunal questions

Isn’t former Taoiseach, Albert Reynolds, a great fellow altogether?

In 2008 he was diagnosed with a serious brain condition and was therefore, according to his doctors, unable to answer questions at the Planning Tribunal.

As a result of this serious brain condition, we were told, Mr. Reynolds had effectively retired from public life.

Since then Reynolds has been living a very public life with no sign of that nasty “serious cognitive impairment” whatsoever.

Today we see him, hale and hearty as ever, up in Dublin to see the Queen of England.

Perhaps that nasty brain condition only kicks in when Reynolds comes within fifty yards of a Tribunal judge?

See here, here, here and here for other examples of Reynolds ‘retired’ public life.

'Royal' taxi regulator grants press interview

The taxi regulator, Kathleen Doyle was, as Pat Kenny put it, ‘flushed out’ by the media and forced to answer questions in connection with the latest scandal involving that industry.

The attitude of this so called public servant was accurately summed up by a caller to a radio show. The Queen of England grants more interviews than our taxi regulator.

In November 2008, in response to another controversy, I wrote about the ‘royal’ tendencies of this particular public servant.

Ms. Doyle is a public servant and therefore, in theory, should be accountable to consumers. There has been a disturbing tendency in recent times for people like Ms. Doyle to adopt a certain royal distance from the great unwashed.

When public servants adopt such arrogant attitudes consumers are entitled to form their own conclusions. Here’s how I imagine Ms. Doyle would address the general peasantry if she ever deigned to dismount from her high horse.

Dear Peasants,

I have been elevated to a position of great importance and therefore feel it is entirely inappropriate that I should deal directly with ordinary people.

I have therefore, at great expense to you, employed a public relations company to deal with all awkward questions from an impertinent media. All questions of a suitably respectful and non awkward nature will be dealt with by my underlings – eventually.

Of course, I do acknowledge and indeed, on rare occasions, feel a degree of gratitude, that my high status, large pay packet, very generous expenses and myriad other perks are all paid for out of your meagre resources.

I would like to take this opportunity to wish all of you the very best of luck in your struggles during the coming economic depression.

I would ask you not to worry too much about my prospects as I am guaranteed regular pay rises, total job security and a very generous pension on completion of my reign.

Yours etc.

(Note to private secretary: Make sure that fellow Duffy gets a copy, it might keep him quiet)

Historic (Twitter) events in Northern Ireland

When I listen to RTEs Northern Ireland editor, Tommy Gorman, I sometimes think he’s slowly going insane.

Without question, he must have the most frustrating, most boring job in the entire universe, and yet, when he reports, his excitement is always that of someone who has just won the lotto.

Last week, for example, he was breadth-takingly telling Drive Time presenter Mary Wilson the dramatic news that positions in the new NI Executive were going to be made on Twitter.

They’re about to make their decisions and they’re going to do so, wait for it Mary, they’re going to do so using Twitter.

This cosmos changing news was met with a deafening silence by a clearly under-whelmed Mary Wilson but Tommy carried on in his excitement.

They’re gathered at Stormont at the moment, they’re about to make their decision and as they do so they will Tweet details of their decision. You can follow the breaking story on…

They will be giving live updates over the next few minutes on the allocation of portfolio’s and I cannot remember this happening anywhere in the world before this Mary.

Live updates from Stormont? – on the allocation of portfolio’s? – on Twitter?

Well, I can tell you one thing, this earth shaking news has changed my life forever.

Electoral law? – Whatever you're having yourself

I wasn’t happy with the response I received from the Dept. of Environment, Heritage and Local Government to my complaint regarding Fianna Fail TD Eamon O’Cuiv so I rang seeking further clarification.

Specifically, I wanted to know; what exactly was the role of the department regarding complaints from the public in respect of suspected breaches of electoral law.

Me: As a senior official in the dept responsible for the proper enforcement of electoral law, have you any concerns whatsoever regarding these events?

Official: When it comes to electoral law we’re forever changing the law on electoral issues. Tweaking here and tweaking there and those tweaks always reflect the fact that there’s something not quite right in the electoral law, that’s how we generally respond to these things.

But in terms of the law there are two approaches, there’s what the law is at the moment and what the law could or should be and we do a lot of entertaining about what the law could or should be and in that regard we would be taking on concerns that people might express.

Me: (In growing astonishment at the answers I was getting) Is it a crime to submit a false name on a nomination paper?

Official: Life isn’t as black or white as all that.

Me: It either is a crime or it’s not or you don’t know.

Official: You’re using very emotive words. It’s the nomination process and you’re supposed to use the name you’re ordinarily known by.

Me: Are you not the regulatory body in charge of electoral law?

Official: Yes, we’re in charge of electoral law.

Me: So it’s up to you to investigate?

Official: No.

Me: It’s not? (Accompanied by astonished laughter).

Official: What I’m willing to do here and I’m perfectly willing to acknowledge is that law as made is never perfect, law is an ongoing process and should be reviewed from time to time.

The information gleaned from this official can be summed up as follows.

The department is forever changing electoral law, tweaking here, tweaking there.

(Irish) Electoral law is never static, there’s what it is at the moment and there’s what it could or should be.

The department is in charge of electoral law but doesn’t investigate complaints.